Disaster area

Her last text: "i am so sorry for this whole mess"
Me: "it's ok, you should have gone with your original answer (i.e. that u can't have a SD, the thought never ever crossed your mind) I still would have liked to spend time with you"

What had happened? One minute Ms Trick or Treat and I were having dinner and lots of drinks at this great upscale place, her wearing the dress I bought her and looking good, having a grand ol' time.
30 minutes later, the sex thing isn't working out. Not compatible in bed for certain reasons I will not elaborate upon.

Here are a few details: Fooling around, feeling good, everyone is all smiles. I take off the dress, and under that she indeed is wearing a black thong as I had suggested to her the day before.
She comments that her boobs are small, I complement her that they are fine. I give her a backrub she greatly enjoys, then more kissing. She says that I use too much tongue (which I don't...) and am I trying to clean her teeth? I get annoyed. Then move toward oral sex and she liks it bt is surprised and uncomfortable that someone would be as bold to do this on her so soon. (Where has she been? She is 25, not 17). I hint I wanted her to reciprocate, and then she squeezes my nipples and she says no can do, she wishes I had discussed my tastes over dinner!
By then I am annoyed. "What is happening?" she asks. I say: "Nothing. You don't like the way I Kiss etc". "I was joking" she said. Whatever. I stop and hand her her thong back. She gets dressed. And says how bad she feels and how sorry she is, and sorry she talked to me originally etc.

And she is feeling uncomfortable in the hotel room, even if its a nice room, and she doesn't like me to use my tongue too much during kissing (never had this complaint before, by the way). She says she feels really bad for all this, and she is finally not comfortable with the situation, and offers to give back the dress. I decline of course. And then she said I should have been more grown up and talked about sexual things before we started getting into that. Well, I was raised a gentleman and I don't think that sex should be a dinner discussion. Anyways...
I shouldn't have brought up the SD thing in the first place, and she shouldn't have accepted. Then everything would have flowed more normally.
Should I text her or not anymore? She said let's play it by ear.
And then half an hour later she sends this apologetic text message.

One lesson for me: Don't ask perfect stangers the SD question as tempting as it may be.
Secondly, go for people who have thought about this hard and have come to terms with it, or with people who have done this before. This way they won't freak out mid way.
So that's one more lesson at the college of SD/SB, lol.
And the fun continues...